Are You A Mensa Virgin?

The  Washington Post’s Mensa Invitational once again  invited readers to take any word from the  dictionary, alter it by adding, subtracting, or  changing one letter, and supply a new  definition. Here  are the  winners:

1.  Cashtration(n.): The act of buying a house,  which renders the subject financially impotent for  an indefinite period of time.
2. Ignoranus:  A person who’s  both stupid and an asshole.
3. Intaxicaton:  Euphoria at  getting a tax refund, which lasts until you realize  it was your money to start with.
4. Reintarnation:  Coming back to  life as a hillbilly.
5. Bozone (n.):  The substance  surrounding stupid people that stops bright ideas  from penetrating. The bozone layer, unfortunately,  shows little sign of breaking down in the near  future.
6. Foreploy:  Any  misrepresentation about yourself for the purpose of  getting laid 
7. Giraffiti:Vandalism spray-painted  very, very high.
8. Sarchasm:  The gulf  between the author of sarcastic wit and the person  who doesn’t get it.
9. Inoculatte:  To take coffee  intravenously when you are running  late.
10. Osteopornosis:A degenerate disease.  (This one got extra credit)
11.Karmageddon:  It’s like, when  everybody is sending off all these really bad vibes,  right? And then, like, the Earth explodes and it’s  like, a serious bummer.
12. Decafalon (n):The  grueling event of getting through the day consuming  only things that are good for you.
13. Glibido:  All talk and no  action.
14. Dopeler  Effect: The  tendency of stupid ideas to seem smarter when they  come at you rapidly.
15.Arachnoleptic  Fit (n.): The frantic dance performed  just after you’ve accidentally walked through a  spider web.
16. Beelzebug (n.): Satan in  the form of a mosquito, that gets into your bedroom  at three in the morning and cannot be cast  out.
17. Caterpallor(n.):  The color you  turn after finding half a worm in the fruit you’re  eating.

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