ALL THE RECENT E-MAILS ABOUT OUR DOG:
I AM SICK AND TIRED OF ANSWERING QUESTIONS ABOUT HIM.
YES, HE BIT 6 PEOPLE WEARING OBAMA T-SHIRTS…
12 PEOPLE WEARING HILLARY T-SHIRTS…
2 CAR DRIVERS WITH BERNIE SANDERS BUMPER STICKERS…
9 TEENAGERS WITH PANTS HANGING PAST THEIR ASS CRACKS…
2 FLAG BURNERS… AND A PAKISTANI TAXI DRIVER.
BUT,FOR THE LAST TIME, THE DOG IS NOT FOR SALE!
AND NO, I DO NOT APPROVE OF HIS SMOKING,
BUT HE SAYS IT HELPS GET THE “BAD TASTE” OUT OF HIS MOUTH.
(which you can’t buy on EBAY any more) and peeled the NRA sticker off my front window. I disconnected my home alarm system and quit the candy-ass Neighborhood Watch. I bought two Pakistani flags and put one at each corner of the front yard. Then I purchased the black flag of ISIS (which you CAN Buy on EBAY) and ran it up the flag pole.
Now the local police, sheriff, FBI, CIA, NSA, Homeland Security, Secret Service and other agencies are all watching my house 24/7. I’ve NEVER felt safer and I’m saving $69.95 a month that ADT used to charge me.
Plus, I bought burkas for me to wear when I shop or travel. Everyone moves out of the way and security can’t pat me down. If they say I’m a male wearing a burka, I just say I’m feeling like a woman today.
Hot Damn…Safe at last. Isn’t this a great country or what?